Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
