If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
