who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
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