ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
