I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Randomize
