About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
