super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
