i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
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