I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
