ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
