btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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