If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
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