whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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