My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
