if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
