Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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