Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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