he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
His nipple licking is glorious
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