I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
