It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
