3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize