East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I think my moral compass just broke
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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