Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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