Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
