does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
