Will you blow on my dice?
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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