Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
