So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Damn victory sex feels great
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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