sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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