I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
