I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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