I threw up into my coffee this morning.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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