wake up i wanna do it froggy style
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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