So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
