Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
