Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
It was confusing and full of hummus
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
