absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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