guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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