I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Girls should come with a carfax report
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
