Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize