i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize
