She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
