I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
