: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
