Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Randomize
