Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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