I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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