I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
