did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
