yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
